Getting what you want…then running like hell.
If you saw my Naked Truth about my biggest dating mistake, you’ll know that in the recent bit, I let go. It’s been a common theme I’ve been talking a lot about lately both in my own personal life and with my patients. Yep, I freed myself from all expectation and began dating again. By drop kicking expectations and stopping myself from analyzing my dates, I began to have fun. Then something happened…[enter a connection].
I hadn’t anticipated it, but when I met the Bartender, I was amazed at how easy it all seemed. Conversation flowed and suddenly chivalry made a comeback. I was happy and immediately I thought, the principles from the SEXYRICH411 must be working. All the months of complaining of not connecting with someone and suddenly I have. Problem was I was faced with another problem…commitment.
Which begs the question, when you finally get what you want, how do you stop yourself from running like hell?
The cab door would open and he’d step out. Versus texting on his phone, he’d look back and offer a hand to help me step out. I’d get goose bumps over goose bumps sitting on a patio and would have to insist that I didn’t need the shirt off his back…although I’ll admit the package underneath is much to be adored. He could do without children (bonus) and he wanted to have a partner and travel the world (bonus x 2!). Our values were in sync and we’d talk until the wee hours (sorry adrenals) after having my dessert pizza for dinner, a recipe out of my Remodel Sexy cookbook that will soon be updated for the SEXYRICH411 program to include even more recipes.
And while my ambition, determination and pace might beat to a faster drumbeat than his, I didn’t care I liked him and that just about freaked the shit out of me. I began coming up with reasons why it might not work. As fast as our relationship status on Facebook would change to “in a relationship”, it would soon find it’s way to being “complicated” to right back to being “single”. Yep, we were doomed.
So the other day, when I spent all day at my second office (the beach) with Sari manifesting our futures, I began talking about the Bartender. I realized I was living in fear because I was stuck in the illusion that being committed meant giving up my freedom.
Suddenly I was grateful for my fear. Because as fast as it could drive me away from him, it also gave me the power to be closer.
I’d take off the runners and learn to let go.
So now I’m curious…have you ever gotten something and then realized that you wanted to run like hell?
I’d like to hear from you.