Alarm #1 (clock radio): beeps…SMACK…10 more minutes.
Alarm #2 (iPhone): sounds of the Carribbean…SMACK…10 more minutes.
Alarm #3 (Melissa): wrestling with the sheets to get warm and falls off the bed…SMACK…okay, I’m up, I’m up…
This morning waking up, no matter how much I knew I had to get out of bed, I had this feeling of dread that kept me wanting to hide underneath the covers. It didn’t help that the world sounded particularly sad this morning as it rained hard. For the first time in a long time, I actually wondered if I made the right decision when I left my fiance two years ago, or left advertising to go back to school and start over. I wondered if alternative medicine and writing Sexy Food Therapy was really fulfilling my true purpose. Somehow my thoughts this morning remained suspended on two very opposing sides and I was about to break before it was even 8am.
I felt like just giving up.
Yes, I was and still am tired…physically and emotionally. I’m not thinking straight these days. I’m tired of drama and men, not seeing eye to eye with family and struggling to make it. After all, the last two years has been filled with some very intense life shifts that I’m ready for things to get a little easier. Lately, I feel like I’m losing my spark, my mojo, my funnies…what is happening, who am I these days and where is God when you need her?
So today, I tried my hardest to get through. Here was my plan of action:
This morning I decided I’d revisit an old recipe, Red Quinoa & Job’s Tears Berry Coco Love. I needed to calm my racing mind with an earthy breakfast like this one. Worry and obsessive thoughts will hamper the digestive system, so I thought to start with a soothing breakfast that was gluten-free and easy to digest.
AYURVEDIC VATA TEA
Still feeling a little off, I knew that coffee would make me anxious this morning. While I love a good cup of java, it also has the ability to increase heart rate which is the last thing I needed today. So I walked across the street to The Tea Emporium and bought a cup of their Ayurveda Vata Organic tea. A warming blend of spices, this tea is said to help an imbalanced Vata constitution. People in this category have racing minds, are worried, tired, and fearful. Sound familiar?
I’m sure that most people would agree, this is certainly comfort food and luckily today I found the perfect blend between my two favourite foods – chocolate and soup. Sound gross? Think again. This Spicy Black Bean Cacao soup reminded me of Mexican mole sauce and was absolutely what I needed.
So I can’t say that all this sexy food cured me…but it certainly did help. And I also can’t say that I didn’t eat any dirty food either (alright, so I ate Green & Black’s: Raisin & Hazelnut Chocolate bar in one sitting). But in the process, I was trying to get through the day and maintain some sort of balance so I didn’t go totally insane.
There were only two things left on the list…
1) Sleep: Tomorrow will be a better day.
2) Italy: Only 11 days away.Not much farther now my little Smurfs…